Hamilton, ON- Sullie Sundara felt lots of different emotions upon her return. The McMaster Marauders were hosting the OUA leading Brock Badgers on Feb. 2. She hadn’t played a full game since Dec. 2 against the Guelph Gryphons – not counting her brief appearance versus the Queen’s Gaels in late January.

The third-year outside hitter felt the excitement of finally being back. She felt the stress of playing such a high-calibre opponent. She felt how it was all a bit of a blur. Sundara knew she had to get down to business through. She knew she had to enter her flow state and manage those emotions.

Sundara didn’t play in the first set but came on the second as the Marauders were trailing by a set. After hitting a serve into the net for her first play, she got more and more settled.

Soon, she was racking up kills. Soon, she was spike serving with power. Soon, she was celebrating with teammates. She finished with 11 kills, two digs and one ace as the Marauders defeated the Badgers in four sets.

Those around her could sense the excitement as well. First-year outside hitter Victoria Potvin knew how tough it was to be out for so long – two months. She saw how consistent Sundara was. How she brings a calmness and energy to the court. She noticed her confidence – how she was really getting after it. Potvin could feel how fun it was to see her getting those kills again.

Marauders head coach Nathan Janzen could see Sundara raring to play for a while. Yes, she’s not fully healthy yet and had her ups and downs – but it’s all part of the return process.

The Kanata native was an OUA All-Star and U SPORTS All-Canadian last season after being a OUA All-Star and U SPORTS All-Rookie team member in her first season.

She’s done so by continually working on her game – mentally and physically. She’s done so by developing that Goldfish memory. She tries to get into what she calls a flow state. Sundara tries to keep a healthy, positive outlook on the sport.

This season, even before her injury, she kept building on her spike serve – something she’s been working on ever since she came to McMaster in 2021. Those at the Burridge Gym saw her career-high eight aces against the Waterloo Warriors on Nov. 10.

Sundara had a modified spike serve in club volleyball, Janzen recalled. Then, her and her McMaster coaches started building her up to serve with more power. That required more strength so she got stronger. “It’s definitely a weapon for her when she starts feeling good about it,” Janzen noted.

She started with the float serve against the Badgers but Janzen sensed she wasn’t feeling confident about it. “Do you want to spike serve instead,” Janzen asked her. Sundara’s eyes lit up. “Okay,” Janzen said. “Go after it.”

Amid all the improvements, some of the biggest things Sundara learned came when she was sidelined. She suffered a stress fracture on her shin and couldn’t play.

Sundara wasn’t happy about it. She hadn’t really had to watch from the sidelines in her time at McMaster. “A big waiting game,” she called her recovery. She couldn’t do any physical activity for a while. Then she had to wait to return to game action.

However, the biggest part was mental. Sundara describes herself as a very impatient person when it comes to wanting to be on the court. She initially thought she would only miss a couple of games…only for it to turn to eight of them.

As her new reality sank in, Sundara realized that meant taking on a new role. Now, she was the one passing on her knowledge and experience onto her teammates.

She would figure out what each of them needed from her. Sometimes it was certain tips and pointers. Sometimes it meant being there to relieve their stress and bring a smile to their face. Sometimes, it meant telling them how to recentre themselves after a point – just like she does.

Sundara likes journaling to digest all her thoughts. When she did so, she would acknowledge how much she missed being on the court with her teammates. “But it’s not really productive for me to sit here and moap,” she noted. “The best thing I can do for this team is to cheer them on.”

She knew she had to put 100 per cent into this new role.

Sundara was in those hotel rooms in Edmonton in late December during those pivotal players-only meetings. She could sense them all being on different pages going into it. She heard them talk about what they wanted to accomplish as a group.

“We’re all here for the same reason and we all care for one another,” she told them. Sundara told them how tough their second half of the season would be. How important it was to stay grounded. if not, they would get into their own heads.

“We all have love and care for each other,” she told the group. “We need to think about that instead of being very internal and thinking about ourselves.”

Libero Hayley Brookes could hear Sundara during those meetings and elsewhere. She was always vocal, positive and supportive. Brookes notices how she would give her extra effort from the sidelines like she would do if she was on the court.

She saw how Sundara was always watching and prepared to give those tips to her teammates. “Her overall commitment to the team has been incredible even though she wasn’t able to play,” Brookes noted.

As much as Sundara gave to her teammates, they returned the favour. They made her feel appreciated and wanted even though she couldn’t be on the court. They helped her get through the mental block of being out.

Sundara remembers those everyday interactions she would have. She has a bubbly personality and likes to joke but also be serious at times.

Every day, her teammates would be there to give her high fives, cheering her on for what she could do as she worked her way back. They kept things lighthearted, keeping her mind off not being able to play. They kept her from feeling alone and disconnected.

“Just treating me no different than before was something that really helped me get through this and made the tough times a lot easier,” Sundara said.

As Sundara continues to work her way back, she does so with a different perspective. She appreciates all the support from her teammates, athletic therapists and support staff that helped her during her recovery.

With her different perspective came a different appreciation. She realized what a privilege it was to be on the court and on the team. She gained an appreciation for a role that’s not the most desirable but just as important.

So, while she wasn’t happy missing so many games…“It was kind of something that I needed,” Sundara said.

“It’s nice to be grounded and be very appreciative and grateful for all my teammates,” she added. “Regardless of what role they’re in.”

Featured Image: Kevin Lassel/McMaster Athletics